Q:  Hi Nina, I consider myself a successful person, I run a successful business and have a great social circle, my life is quite full of joy and happiness, however the one area that seems to be missing for me is a meaningful relationship.  I am in my mid thirties and am ready to find someone special that will fit into my life and elevate it, however most of the relationships I have had end up leaving me empty and unhappy.  I am leery of investing too much time with someone only to be disappointed in the end.  How can I attract the right person in my life?

A:  Thank you for your question.  While I am never one to recommend dredging up the past, in this instance I believe that it’s important for you to take an inventory of your past relationships.  I want to you consider what was missing in them. When I say missing, I don’t mean what was wrong, but really what would have made the relationship better.   Specifically, look internally, what was missing from you that left you feeling empty and unhappy?  In any relationship you can only control what you are or are not bringing into the relationship and therefore it’s important to evaluate how you are showing up in the mix.  It’s easy for us to point a finger at the other person and see what was missing in them, which then makes you self righteous.  Self righteousness never works.

Another exercise that I would ask that you consider is to be very clear on what type of partner you want to be then write it down and practice being that person all the time.   The other part of the exercise is to write down what you want from a partner, be very specific for both yourself and your partner.  Put this somewhere you can see it every day. I believe in the Law of Attraction, so in order to attract the right partner to yourself, first be the right partner!

It’s my honour to serve you! God bless!

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Email me at nina@theapostropheproject.com

Nina Ganguli is a Change Agent, Certified Professional Life Coach and Author of the book: Confessions of a Can’t-aholic: How to go from “I Can’t” to “I Can!”

For more about Nina Ganguli check out her website: www.theapostropheproject.com

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