Let us learn to appreciate there will be times when the trees will be bare, and look forward to the time when we may pick the fruit: Anton Chekhore

When I take stalk of my life, I realize for the majority of it, my trees had been bare. I was victimized by my father, sexually, physically and emotionally abused by him from childhood into my late 20s. I was living a clandestine life. Up until 10 years ago when my father died, there were no real fruits, only holograms of fruits, ones that many a time I chose to believe were real in order to get through life without giving up.
When my father died, I discovered how desperately I needed this fruit. Aside from meeting my husband and having my children, life was empty, there were no fruits because someone had taken it from me and I was living only shell of an existence. Once I realized this, I was driven to find the fruit. As I look back I can now appreciate the difficulty that I experienced because I have grown so much as I have processed it all. The result or fruit is that I have found my purpose and am fully engaged and passionate about it. If I had not had not lived and experienced the life I have, I couldn’t be the woman I am today so in gratitude I say thank you.

This may seem odd, to be thankful for abuse and such, but let me explain where I am coming from. Living with the secret and hiding from past was eating me up inside. I constantly felt like a fraud, because from the outside looking in, I seemed to have it all. The problem was I didn’t have me and I didn’t know it. When my son was about two years old, I felt very depressed, all the years of suppressing my reality was slowly beginning to catch up to me. I had no idea what was going on. I seemingly had everything that I had ever wanted in life. I married a fabulous man, had two children, a girl and a boy and was running my own business, going on vacations, etcetera, so I was living the dream right? Not so for me, I felt so caged in; actually I didn’t know how I felt but I knew that I wasn’t happy. I was looking for something but had no idea what that was.

Then my father died and everything exploded inside me. On the outside things were not any better. I fell apart; there was no more hiding, no more clandestine life. I had to begin to stand with my truth. And so the journey to find the truth and stand in the truth have been the fruit of that long lasting bare tree.

I’m not alone, so many of us have faced bare trees. Life is full of hills and valleys, quiet times and noisy times, exciting times and boring times. Here’s what I have learned sitting under my bare tree; this is where the expanse of growth happens.

The last 10 years of my life have been so powerful and my truth has pushed me to do things I never thought I would do. The most important thing is that I have learned how to care for myself, how to address all of my negative self talk, I have discovered who I am and who I was meant to be, what my purpose is in the world and how to manifest this so I can help those who don’t think they can be who they want to be and live their divine purpose.

Don’t give up hope, when you are in a dark place or sitting under a bare tree, one of the best ways to walk through, no matter how hard it is, is to try to see what you are learning, or how it can be used to bring you to who you are supposed to be and what you are meant to be doing. There have been people who have been through horrendous and heinous things and have used their experiences to change the world and bring light and fruit to make this world a better place. The most important thing to remember is that it’s all about your mindset, having patience and trusting in the universe. Just like we have different seasons in the weather, we have different seasons in our life and we do our best to get through winter so we can enjoy spring and summer to enjoy all the growth and change that has occurred over the winter.

If you only see bare trees right now, trust me there is a fruit basket full of awesome waiting around the corner!
It’s my honour to serve you! God Bless!

I’d love to connect with you! You can email me at:
nina@theapostropheproject.com